I'm your SPS (Sexual Positioning System), and here is your suggested route, which will lead you away from drinking too much and having regretful sex with a neighbor or coworker:
Bathroom--more specifically bent over the sink, in the tub, in the shower, or on the toilet:
- Good: Nothing is cushy, so nobody should fall asleep during it. You have various lotions available at arm's length. Ooh, a razor. Look, a towel--what a handy baby-batter-picker-upper.
- Bad: Toilet seats break. Tiles can leave odd marks on posteriors. You'll notice those spots you missed. Mirrors are not always our friends. Try to avoid seeing your O-face.
- Good: It reminds one of giddy teenage years. Music is conveniently close by. The woman has to do most of the work, as usual.
- Bad: Leather seats make farting noises. Windows fog. The steering wheel and rear view mirror tend to get in the way.
- Good: The additional sensations of the elements, such as wind and dew. Fluids are disposed of in the most bio-friendly ways possible.
- Bad: Sand, grass, or pebbles in ass crack. In a word: YouTube.
Pool or Hot Tub:
- Good: Additional lubrication provided free of charge. Chlorine sterilizes, to a certain extent.
- Bad: Floating sex goo and the possibility of encountering some that isn't yours. Air bubbles are often assumed to be rising farts.
- Good: Access to sex aids, including food and frozen goodies. Counters are conveniently set at penis height, depending on your nationality.
- Bad: I was looking forward to having cucumber slices on my salad, and now ... ew, just ew.